Finding the courage to move on from a break up is an issue many people have to deal with when they’ve been in a relationship that has failed.
So, how does someone start moving on with their life, once a love affair has ended?
If you’re stuck in a relationship that’s either going nowhere, boring, or just plain wrong, maybe you’re considering breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend. But, you’re really worried, even terrified, at how it might to affect you, and your life in general.
Unfortunately, the doubts about breaking up, and the ability to move with their lives, often causes individuals to stay in relationships that are either unsatisfying, or physically and emotionally destructive. They feel trapped!
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Does Breaking Up and Moving On From A Relationship Scare You?
What if you want desperately to break up with your partner and be single all over again? Being able to date whoever you want, or perhaps just spending time alone, or with your friends, is what you crave.
But, the possibility of trauma, and the unpleasantness a break up with your partner could cause, as well as the fear and uncertainty of moving on with your life, puts you off taking any real action.
The question is, how do you start moving on after a breakup? Well, first up, you need to take control of your situation and break off your relationship! Seems obvious, doesn’t it?
Break ups don’t have to be dramatic or messy affairs. You can simply talk it over with your partner. Be honest, and tell them you don’t believe that you’re right for each other. You never know, your ‘soon-to-be-ex’ might be thinking along the same lines, but was too frightened to bring it up, and they will agree with you.
Or, on the other hand, they may hoping that you will re-think your decision. But, whatever you do, don’t give in! Instead, move on, go forward with your life!
What Stops You From Moving On?
It’s a well-known fact that ending a relationship is never easy, regardless of the circumstances surrounding the break up. And, in the beginning, it may be really difficult to fill the void of not having your ex around all the time. But, it’s only natural to experience a sense of loss, it’s similar to a bereavement.
Also, there could be people, whom you thought were friends, who decide to side with your ex. They may even turn against you, and refuse to even talk to you. Unfortunately, this comes with the territory, and there’s not much you can do to change their thinking. So, realize and accept that you may lose some people from your life after breaking off your relationship with your partner.
But don’t despair. If the relationship wasn’t meeting your needs, then moving on from a break up is necessary. It will give you a chance to reconnect with friends and family.
All too often, a relationship can dominate your life, and the first casualties of romance seem to be people who, in other circumstances, are closest to you; your friends and family.
So, after a break up, get back in touch with your friends. Plan a girls’ or guys’ night out. Spend a weekend at a health resort, or take a trip to somewhere so you can have heaps of fun. Just indulge and pamper yourself. Leave the past behind!
However, it won’t be all plain sailing, though. Don’t get frustrated or annoyed if your friends tend to be a bit hesitant or unwilling at first. If you’ve neglected them for your ex and the relationship, it’s likely that they’ll be reluctant to welcome you back straight away.
If this happens, then just take things one step at a time. Don’t simply expect them to fall at your feet, and welcome you back into the fold as if nothing’s happened. Be realistic in your expectations.
And, what about your family? They might not have liked your ex, or perhaps they did! Whatever the case, you’ll need to rebuild relationships with your relatives. This will probably be easier than you think. Don’t they say that “blood is thicker than water”?
Make good use of this time to understand exactly what your relationship with each family member means to you. You might even discover that family bonds become stronger once you move on after a break up.
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Moving On After A Break Up
Generally speaking though, most relationships involve compromises. But, now you’ve ended the relationship, you have the chance to once again get back into the activities you put aside for the sake of love. You might even develop new interests and skills. Take this as your opportunity to explore what the world has to offer.
Some time down the track, you’ll most likely find yourself involved in a serious relationship. And, when this happens, you’ll want to have experienced the kind of self-growth that makes a romantic relationship stronger than any you’ve had before.
Use your time while you move on from a break up for self-development, happiness and re-discovery. Focus on what you really want out of life so that your next relationship can be even better.
Also Read: How to be Happy Alone without Friends?